Blog Challenge: Cincy Defeats Packers

This is paying my due to Zeb for accepting his “Gut Feeling” challenge that the Cincinnati Bengals would defeat my Green Bay Packers on September 22. It’s taken me this long to actually sit down and write it because I think I was too angry, disappointed, or shocked by that game.

As a recap, before Aaron Rodgers took the field, the Bengals led 14-0. Then the Bengals decided to make a game of it by coughing up the ball on four straight possessions, but the Packers only had a 16-14 lead at half-time. The Packers scored two offensive touchdowns to begin the third quarter to go up 30-14, and then promptly took their foot off the gas. Give Cincy the benefit of never quit playing because they scored two TDs to close to 30-27 when the fateful fourth down fumble by Jonathan Franklin was scooped up by Terence Newman who ran 58 yards for the winning TD. I really felt the momentum change when Marvin Jones had that 22 yard reception and Cincy got an additional 15 yards on the personal foul on Tramon Williams. Just plain fricking stupid.

Heroes: There were no heroes on the Packers side. The entire Bengals team should get the award for their never quit attitude representative of their coach Marvin Lewis.

Goats: In no particular order with no particular value of blame, there’s many goats on the Packers. Starting with Jeremy Ross – thank God they released him on Monday after the game, should have made him walk back from Cincy. His fumble (second of this short season) of a kick-off at the 2 allowed Cincy to go up 14-0. Aaron Rodgers – looked like a rookie. Two interceptions, leading his receivers to get walloped over the middle (Finley), and having passes knocked down repeatedly is especially disappointing after throwing for 480 yards against Washington. Offensive line – you guys gave up another 4 sacks making it 10 in only three games. The thought of having Seneca Wallace as your backup QB ought to make you play better.  Mike McCarthy – you had only two running backs active for the game and had them both go out with injuries. That’s a roll of the dice that came up craps. Jonathan Franklin – yeah, you were almost THE hero of the game by coming off the bench and rushing for 103 yards; but that fumble cost us the game.

Injuries are killing us again. Was it GB’s first possession when Jermichael Finley went out due to a concussion? James Starks left in the second quarter with a twisted knee and looked to be on pace to rush for over 100 yards for a second straight week. Jonathan Franklin left after injuring his foot/ankle but returned on the Packer’s last possession but was ineffective trying to pass block. And Clay Matthews didn’t play in the second half after tweaking a thigh muscle that plagued him previously. He was pretty disruptive in sacking Andy Dalton and even forced BenJarvis Green-Ellis to fumble. His injury really started GB’s downslide in the second half. Thank God Green Bay has an early bye this week in hopes of getting well.

Well, you can’t win them all; but this one hurt because it was given away.

Just A Baseball Fan

A couple of weeks ago, my cousin, John, called me up and asked if I would be interested in attending a Baltimore Orioles game. He’s a season ticket holder and had an extra for the last weekend series against the Boston Red Sox. At the time of his call, the Orioles were still in contention; and with Boston in first place, it seemed like an excellent opportunity to watch some good baseball by playoff teams. Well, as you know, since then the Orioles fell out of the playoff race and this series was just to finish up the season. Because I don’t get to see my cousin very often, I still decided to attend the game with him and just enjoy the evening.

Being a bit of a foodie and the game being played at night, I suggested we leave early for Baltimore and try a place that had great sandwiches. I left my house by 1245, gassed up, and was on my way to Arlington to pick up John by 1300. As soon as I hit 301 north, I heard on the radio that there were three accidents on 295 going into DC; two going southbound (which shouldn’t affect me), but the third was northbound right at my exit. Long story short, by trying to go around and take side streets, it took me two hours just to get to Arlington, and I saw parts of DC which are scary even in broad daylight.

I decided we would eat at Chap’s Pit Beef that was featured on both Food Network’s “Diners, Drive-In’s, and Dives” and Travel Channel’s “Man vs. Food”. Chap’s uses an in-door charcoal grill to cook their meat and a deli slicer to pile it high. I had the Richwich (named after Adam Richman), which is beef, corned beef, turkey and sausage on a sub roll; while John had the Tom Dog, which is turkey, sausage and cheese on a sub roll. We also shared a large order of French fries with gravy (a staple in Baltimore). The meat was tender, delicious, and the food was awesome. We were both wishing we wore stretchy pants. No Boog’s BBQ for us tonight.

Oh, yeah, there was a game. My cousin's seats were directly behind home plate in the upper deck. The weather was a perfect 70 degrees without a cloud in the sky at game time. Was texting Zeb about Red Sox fans wearing fake beards because there were two groups wearing them. Shortly after the game started, I had to leave my seat because my manager called me on my cell phone because one of our field offices lost air conditioning, and they had to shut down our agency’s off-site back-up servers in their LAN room and keep the suite’s doors open making the place unsecure. I thought, “We pay GSA a hefty management fee,” and spoke to our admin officer on site and told her to call GSA and demand an emergency portable AC unit be delivered as soon as possible. By the time I got back to my seat it was the third inning and that’s when the game started to get interesting. (They got the portable AC unit installed this morning and was able to secure the suite.)

The game lasted 3 hours and 20 minutes with 26 hits, and I lost count of how many pitchers. Orioles scored one-run in both the second and third innings. Boston answered with one-run in the fourth, fifth, and sixth. Boston’s pitcher, Junichi Tazawa, was really pounding the strike zone; but I guess he was putting too much of the ball over the plate and not on the corners which resulted in giving up two runs and got the loss. Jim Johnson pitched the ninth looking for his 49^th save. Jonny Gomes batted with a runner on second base and saw five straight 95 mph fastballs forcing a full-count. Gomes froze when Johnson threw him a 86 mph slider for a called third strike to end the game. Final score 6-5.

I made it home by 0120 and had a scotch. I hit the rack by 0245 almost too tired to sleep.

2013 Pick 'Em Week 3

Don't forget to get your picks in, if you haven't already, for week 4.  We have one blog challenge game this weekend, RJ's Raiders vs G's Skins.

Here are your week 3 results:

  - Geo:  11

  - Tom:  10

  - BK:  9

  - Rick:  9

  - Mike:  9

  - Zeb:  8

  - RJ:  8

  - AA:  6

 

And then your overall standings as follows:

 

Mike – 30

Zeb - 28 with one win

Brent - 28 with one win

George – 28 with one win

RJ - 27

Tom – 27

Rick – 26

AA - 25

The newcomer is kicking our asses, fellas.

 

 

 

Burger? What Burger?

I wonder what Brent Musburger thinks about this commercial… as for me, I’m grabbing a breakfast biscuit in the morning.

A Challenge?

We have two teams, the Washington Redskins and the Oakland Raiders, with one win between them playing each other for… I have no idea. The Jacksonville Jaguars have the inside track on the first overall pick in next spring’s NFL Draft. Neither the Redskins or Raiders will make the playoffs, either.

But regardless, the Raiders are at home in a stadium that has the occasional sewer backup issues. Memo to RGIII when he visits O.co Coliseum this Sunday: Don’t wash your hands!

Maybe the “ick” factor will be enough for the Redskins to get creeped out in The Black Hole? I’ll take the “ick” and challenge DCHomer in this week’s blog challege!

Go Sewage! Go Raiders!

$$$$

Just a couple of random thoughts about last week's play.

SF Aldon Smith was arrested Friday (20 Sep) for DUI after crashing his car into a tree.  When the cops found him, he was passed out, foot on the gas peddle (the wheels were off the ground and spinning like crazy).  He had a .15 BAC and the cops found weed on him. 

My point?  He played Sunday in the loss to the Colts.  He had five tackles to add to his league leading 17 tackles and 3.5 sacks (through 3 games).  Why did they play him?  Hmmm....lemme guess....$$$!!

Why did Washington "clear" RGKnee to start the season after only 8 months of rehab on a severely reconstructed knee?  Hmmm...lemme guess....$$$!!

Okay, we are talking about professionals, so I guess making money the motivation is kinda moot--or, would it be redundant?  Whatever--we're not talking about the NCAA (the "National Cash Cash-ollegiate Athletic Association"), but when will NFL fans get it that it's not about their cheering and fandom?  It's certainly not for the sport of it?  How did ABC put it many decades ago:  "The thrill of competition?" 

Nah. 

It's certainly not anything close to Terrence Mann's speech:  "...this field, this game: it's a part of our past...It reminds of us of all that once was good and it could be again..."

Nah!  Not that either.  Terrence did get it right on the money aspect:

  - They'll come to the football stadium for reasons they can't even fathom....

  - They'll arrive at their seats as innocent as children, and pass over $10 for a beer without even thinking about it...

  - They'll fork over $50 to park and $15 for a luke warm burger: for it is money they have and peace they lack...

And the owners will watch the game's receipts and it'll be as if they dipped themselves in magic waters.

God bless free agency!

John Scott Tried To Fight Phil Kessel?

Yeah, this sums up my reaction to the third-period brawl in tonight’s Sabres-Leafs game. 10 for 10 shooting since shots landing on the line count for the higher score.

The brawl started when Sabres enforcer John Scott tried to fight Phil Kessel. Kessel swung his stick at Scott a couple of times to defend himself before the rest of the Leafs tried to jump Scott at center ice. After everyone paired off (not sure), Kessel bloodied some Sabres player I’ve never heard of, Jonathan Bernier and Ryan Miller had a goalie fight, and David Clarkson will likely get a non-paid vacation for leaving the bench to join the brawl.

In summary, the Leafs are in regular season form already. *laughs*

My Gut

Maybe it was just a tummy ache.  My gut brings me some pretty good upsets but then again, sometimes it's wrong and then other times I have to wonder "Where were you with that upset?"

Early into the second half of today's early games my gut has had mixed results, resulting in the need to start to write a blog challenge post.  When the Bengals went up 14-0 on the Pack, my gut looked like a genius.  I haven't watched the game but this is the game that was probably just an upset stomach, since the Pack has roared back in this one. (as Brady throws an end zone interception with a chance to put Brent's Bucs away...still leading 17-3)
My gut obviously was taking a nap when it came to what might well be the two biggest upsets of the weekend, although probably no one else picked these either.  Where were you, gut, regarding the Ravens vs Texans and especially the BLEEPING Carolina Panthers with a three-score, shutout lead over the NY Football Giants?
The last game that involved my gut was G's Redskins, where the score is currently 17-17 in the 3rd period.  Fair to say to this point your boys have played better than you expected, G?

So now that the Pack is up 31-14, it appears obvious I need to eat crow.  My stomach's not gonna like that one bit.  Obviously the vaunted Bengal defense is not so vaunted or no match for Aaron Rodgers and the Packer offense.
The Patriots did not look good at all early in their match with Brent's Bucs but the Bucs couldn't or didn't fully capitalize on the fact that early on their offense moved the ball down the field at least four times on the Pats defense, only to come away with 3 points.  Not really gonna brag here because I rarely do anyway and my Pats are far from world beaters at this point.  I will say that the Bucs are a better team than their record but what does that really mean?  Look at their personnel and how well they play in stretches.  Is it coaching or the intangible leadership?
The Carolina Panthers are shutting out the Giants 31 zip.  Wouldn't you love it if your gut told you that one and you trusted it enough to bet the bank at Vegas on that one?!
Why haven't I mentioned any details of these games?  Because I've been watching the Pats, Sox and the Cup race at NH. 
My gut is always wrong regarding the Chargers, ALWAYS.  Looks like G was right, at least that his team would lose.  Next week's MY-TEAM-IS-WORSE-THAN-YOURS BOWL between G's Skins and RJ's Raiders should be interesting or at least the week leading up to it listening to them proclaim their team is worse.  So are you both going to pick your team to lose this game, even though it's a blog challenge involving your teams?
I'm not sure what the moral is in the end but I do know this:  Rick, you owe us a crow-eating.  Bengals-34 Packers-30.  Don't ignore your gut completely.

Dear Red Sox

The below was posted on Facebook by one of the founders of this blog, who can't seem to get into his account and doesn't have the patience to figure out why (I'm still working on him).  As you'll see, he has an interesting take and a flair with words and sentence structure.  He's been posting these "Dear Red Sox" posts all season and this is one of the best.

By AAHole:

Dear Red Sox,
Congrats, gentlemen. I just finished watching the game (despite learning of the outcome earlier), and it was a surprisingly rewarding experience. Last year was truly disheartening in that for the first time in my life, I was unthinkably disgusted and indifferent. I basically didn't give a shit, and that was so foreign to me it's hard to explain. I certainly didn't expect that I'd get drawn back in so thoroughly - there was a lot to make up for - but I was wrong. This squad reaffirmed and reignited my passion for the team and dissolved all that which repelled me in '12 with their obvious cohesion, focus, and damned good baseball. They played hard and cared. Win or lose, that's all I ever look for from them.
There are too many people who contributed to point out - many of them the usual suspects - but i'll mention a few: Shane Victorino (the best outfielder the Sox have had in more than a decade), Napoli (clutch!), the young guys (Carp, Nava, Middlebrooks, etc...), the surprisingly solid Drew, and the brilliant Uehara. I even have to give props to my historical piss-mint Lackey - sincerely well done, dude. Most of all, I think Farrell and Cherington deserve the primary credit. Between them they signed the right folks and made sure that they all toed the line, righted the ship, and made them realize that what it's really all about is caring about playing good baseball. That had been lost, and it's a pleasure to see it again.
Looking forward to the playoffs, boys! Well done indeed!

When Archery, Darts and Sports Mix…

Ever since I bought my pistol crossbow I kept thinking to myself, “Wouldn’t it be nice to shoot at a target with an opposing team’s sports logo on it?” Today, that became a reality just in time for tonight’s exhibition game between the Toronto Maple Leafs and their division rivals, the Buffalo Sabres.

I found a printable target online and then made obvious modifications. The Sabres logo is the center target. The former Sabres logo, derisively called a “Buffaslug” for it’s banana slug/buffalo hybrid appearance, is centered on the four smaller targets.

Not only can I use this with my pistol crossbow, but it works great for the dart board I have in the hallway, too!

If you want this for your own use:

1. Click on the image and a full-size version will open in a new tab in your browser.
2. Right-click on the full-size image and save it to your hard drive.
3. Use your favorite graphics program (ex: Photoshop or Paint Shop Pro) and open the image.
4. Set your program’s printer settings to print graphics “fit to page” so it prints out on one 8.5” x 11” page.
5. Print the target and have fun!

It’s a safe bet I’ll be making many more of these in the coming months.

2013 Pick 'Em Week 2

I apologize up front for not having G's skills with tables, charts and colors.

With that out of the way, here's week 2's results:

Brent - 12

Mike – 11

RJ – 11

AA – 10

Zeb – 9
Tom – 8

Rick – 8

George – 8

Combine that with week one results and voila:

Mike – 21

Zeb - 20 with one win

Brent - 19 with one win

RJ - 19

AA - 19

George – 17

Tom – 17

Rick – 16

Get your Thursday picks in before kickoff tomorrow.  You can leave your pick as a comment to this thread if you'd like.  Congrats to Brent for winning week two and Mike for having the overall lead.  Remember, two winners at season's end -- the most right picks and the most weekly wins.

 

WASHINGTON vs. PACKERS

The venerated RGIII and the rest of the not-so venerated Washington Football Club arrived in Green Bay for a date with infamy. It was ugly, and by "ugly," I mean "UGG-A-LEE!" Not only did the team have to deal with a few thousand obnoxious "cheese heads," screaming in some incomprehensible football language ("cheers" I think it's called), but they had to run a gauntlet of set up by the Oneida Indian Nation over the team name. So, to "pack" (pun intended) salt into the wound, the Packers just proceeded to thoroughly, completely, unquestionably, absolutely, and systematically KICK OUR ARSES! There's not much I can say about this game, except..."Oww!" and "Ouch!" and "Dag, yo? Why in my nads?" I think I'll just have to develop a taste for the old raven (crow), because it looks like I'm going to be feasting on it this year.

COLLEGE SPORTS AND MONEY (Part 1)

At the risk of repeating myself (and boring you in the process--again), here's how I'd solve the NCAA's "pay-'em-to-play" problem:

    1.  I would dissolve all college sports scholarships.

    2.  I'd allow all colleges to "hire" their athletes and treat them as paid employees. 

    3.  There would be no academic or scholastic requirement for this position; their classification would be "employee-athlete" vice "student-athlete."

    4.  The schools would only "pay" the athletes a sufficient sum as a stipend; the schools would house and feed these employees on campus, as part of their compensation package, but to keep them on campus for the purpose of training, practice, and managing their conduct during the season.

    5.  The employee-athlete would play for four (4) years only.  This is purely for athletic, mental, and physical development in preparation for a potential professional career.

    6.  Any potential residual income that could be earned by the employee-athlete in the form of merchandizing, paid speeches, honorariums, sponsorship, would be due and owing to the employee-athlete, but shared by the school (50/50) and held in interest-bearing trust.

    7.  After four years, the contract between the employee-athlete and the school terminates, automatically.  Any potential revenue directly related to the on-field/court/rink exploits of the employee-athlete after the 4-year term, belongs to the athlete (100%). 

    8.  All money, held in trust, will remain in an interest-earning account and will be used to fund a full college education if the athlete is unable to obtain a professional sports contract, and wishes to pursue a degree-bearing education.  Otherwise, all money is due and payable to the athlete immediately upon termination of the contract.

    9.  If, at that time, the athlete is good enough to turn professional, off he goes--God bless him.

    10.  After two years, the athlete no longer has any viable prospects for a professional contract, and he now wishes to pursue a legitimate college education, the money held in trust will be used to fund that education.  If the athlete's total in-trust account assets are less than one half (1/2) of the total cost of four year's worth of tuition, room, board, books, and fees for the schools for which he was engaged as an employee-athlete, then school will fund 1/2 of the total cost of a four-year education, with the athlete funding 1/2 through whatever sources are available to him (personal assets, scholarships, grants, loans, etc.).

Yaz gets a statue (and other baseball thoughts)

Firstly, if you haven't heard -- and if you're not a Red Sox fan, you may not have -- the Red Sox will be unveiling a Carl Yastrzemski statue outside Fenway Park before season's end.  He was this author's boyhood idol

I know it's hard to tell in this picture because of the backstop but that's yours truly at the age of 11 or 12 (good god, 1973ish).  It just so happened that my team's uniform had red socks but that's a patented Yaz stance, closed and bat held high.  Yes, I did wear #8, played left field, threw right and hit lefty.  Next time I'm at Fenway there will be a picture taken of me with that statue.  Can't wait.

The Red Sox have had an incredible season thus far and over the last few weeks it would be hard to argue against them playing like the best team in baseball, and to add extra sweetness they've taken 6 out of 7 games from the Yankees in the last couple of weeks -- games the Yanks badly needed.  I worry they've peaked too soon and anything can happen in the playoffs but I'm excited and optimistic.  But even if they hadn't played this well, this is a Red Sox team we all can love and get behind, a team with seemingly no unbearable egos, a bunch of grinders who love to play...the baseball version of gym rats.  We love this team.

A couple of other tidbits:  The Tampa Bay Rays need a new home.  After several years of very good and competitive teams, a few trips to the playoffs and one World Series visit, the best this team can draw in the middle of a pennant race is 10,000 people against another playoff contender.  I know there really aren't any major baseball markets left but they need to go somewhere else.  Mexico City?

I heard what I have to think is an unreal stat on the radio today, although I did hear it on ESPN.  Apparently the Astros had a game this weekend where they only had ONE THOUSAND television viewers.  I'm not sure how they could ever know exactly how many people are watching but that's just pathetic.

Is There Any Possibility For Negative Credibilty?

Because if there is, I just saw it on Saturday with NASCAR holding a press conference explaining how they are going to ensure that their races have credibility. Mike Helton, Randy Pemberton, and Brian France. They went and told the Sprint Cup racers yesterday in a 17 minute meeting in the Nationwide Garage the new "rules of the road". And yet as the new Tenat 12-4L is laid out to us that aren't in the NASCAR garage, I am thinking, this does nothing for most of the situations that happen during the year that brings the credibility down for NASCAR races.

The Quest For The Imperfect Season Almost Ended Before It Began

Many pundits are predicting the Oakland Raiders will run the table and join the 2008 Detroit Lions as the only NFL team to ever go 0-16. But are they really that bad? Maybe not.

They lost to the Indianapolis Colts, but it wasn’t nearly the mud hole stomping I predicted. I told a number of people not to be surprised if the Colts run up 40+ points on the Raiders. Not only did that not happen, but the Raiders actually had the lead until the middle of the fourth quarter.

The Raiders made a game out of this contest for one reason: Terrelle Pryor.

The former Ohio State quarterback had 217 yards passing, 112 yards rushing, and did something no other Raiders quarterback has been able to do in quite some time – make plays. When all seemed lost on third or even fourth down, Pryor would make a key completion or scramble past outstretched defenders on his way to a first down.

Even though Pryor had two interceptions that killed any chance the Raiders had of pulling off the upset, I’m still very pleased with his performance. Keep in mind this is only his second NFL start. My only concern with Pryor is that he still has a tendency not to check all of his receivers before he starts running. At some point, NFL defenses will catch onto this and be more effective in stopping him.

I hope Pryor makes the adjustment sooner rather than later. I believe he can be a really good NFL quarterback someday, but I’d like it to happen sooner rather than later!

Does My Team Suck That Bad?

This is some of the funniest crap I've ever read about the Redskins.  But the funniest thing is--IT'S ALL TRUE, SCREAMINGLY TRUE!

The following are selected sound bites from "Deadspin's" "Why Your Team Sucks: 2013"





1.  YOUR QUARTERBACK:  Robert Griffin III, who has all the athleticism of Cam Newton and none of the durability.

     Only the Redskins could fuck this up. Only the Redskins could draft such a brilliant young talent, let him get slaughtered on a rec softball league-quality playing surface, and then spend the entire offseason passive aggressively sniping with both him and his doctor. RGIII is the most exciting player in football, yet he is exceptionally fragile, unsurprisingly pigheaded, and is flanked by WTA-quality stage parents. The Redskins—who suck at public relations more than any company has sucked at anything—have mishandled Griffin to the point where I'm now excited for him to finally lose it and tweet out "FUCK SHANNY" and then delete the tweet five seconds later.

     Redskins fans worship RGIII the way a stalker worships a woman he's about to stab to death. They love him so much that they get SO VERY ANGRY when RGIII does something to disappoint them, like accepting gifts from fans on his wedding registry. WE LOVE YOU RGIII BUT NOW YOU MUST DIE FOR NOT BEING PERFECT. WE SHALL WEAR YOUR SKIN AT NIGHT. If I were RGIII, I would be terrified.

2.  THE 18 WORST REDSKINS EVER:   

     a.  Snyder. More Crown Royal, Mr. Snyder?

     b.  Albert Haynesworth. The best part was that everyone knew he would tank the second he got paid, and yet the Skins couldn't WAIT to fly him in.

     c-f.  Bruce Smith/Deion Sanders/Jeff George/Mark Carrier. I miss the days of Snyder openly trying to buy a championship and then failing miserably.

     g.  Michael Westbrook

     h.  Malcolm Kelly. It's amazing how many teams have whiffed on wideouts in the second round. Drafting a wideout in the second round is like putting your hand in a coffee grinder.

     i-k.  Jim Zorn/Norv Turner/Steve Spurrier

     l.  Taylor Jacobs

     m.  Desmond Howard

     n.  Josh Morgan. That's some clutch taunting, right there.

     o.  Heath Shuler

    p.  Dana Stubblefield

     q.  Adam Archuleta. Say his name to any Skins fan and they will drive off a highway ramp.

     r.  Danny Wuerffel. Once upon a time, there existed a LESS talented Tim Tebow.

3.  FAN MAIL:

 

"Remember that one kid in school who was popular only because he had money and nobody ACTUALLY enjoyed spending more than 30 seconds in his presence? And everyone was just about to wash their hands of him completely but then his folks got him a Camaro for his 16th birthday? And then everyone wanted to hang out with him again, right up until the point where he wrapped the Camaro around a telephone pole, at which point everyone felt justified in just writing him off as a complete dipshit for good?  The Redskins are that kid and Robert Griffin III is our Camaro."

 

"FedEx Field is a super dump. It's the reason you stay home to watch games in HD on your couch. Getting in and out of the place is a disaster that will take you hours. It's a giant corporate shit hole that ends up half full of Eagles or Cowboys fans even when they aren't fucking playing there. The 400 section is a nightmare level filled with drunken brawls, usually among Redskins fans. The field is the biggest embarrassment in the NFL. It looks like a fucking mine field. Snyder will spend a fortune on players (usually shitty) but probably not even $10 on the awful grounds crew this team has. We wait decades to get a franchise QB and our own fucking field helps injure him. Perfect."

 

"The team's pass defense was 30th in the league so they finally cut DeAngelo Hall. To replace him they bring in - DeAngelo Hall!"

 

"All the bad things ever written and said about this stadium are understatements. It is the anti-stadium."

"If Dan Snyder was drowning in the Anacostia River, I'd throw him a cinder block."

"RGIII's knee will no doubt collapse into itself, creating a black hole and ending all life on Earth as we know it."

"Rex Grossman is still somehow on the roster."

"Go up to Northern Virginia and ask anyone to name their favorite player from the past 10 years and the answer is ALWAYS Chris Cooley."

"I love my dog. She's really great and I'd do anything for her. I'd also put her in a burlap bag and beat her with a brick if it meant not seeing any more fucking wide receiver screens to Santana Moss for a two yard loss."

"In 2007 I snagged the Eagles game from my father's season tickets to bring a college friend from Philly. Two drunk morons decided they'd had enough arguing over Joe Gibbs's play calling, stood up and started some aggravated jawing. Sitting directly behind one, who sat behind the other, we had a front row view as the Redskins fan in the higher row, pushing three bills, decided to spear tackle the other, much skinnier, Redskins fan. They flew into the row below and broke off the plastic seat on impact before their wrestling crashed them down into the next row, crushing the people beneath them and scattering those nearby. After fighting down a few more rows of the upper deck, they landed on another drunk Redskins fan who, instead of getting out of the way, joined in. The melee, which began in the 15th row, turned into one of those cartoon fights where you only see fists sticking out of a tangle of bodies, eventually reaching the bottom of the section where a half dozen security guards showed up and restrained everyone.  Immediately after the fight began, McNabb tossed a screen pass to Brian Westbrook that resulted in a scrambling 57-yard touchdown run that put the Eagles up by one with three minutes left. I only saw a split second of the play as the stadium noise caused me to look up from the fight long enough to acknowledge the Redskins were blowing the game. The Eagles would go on to score another touchdown and win 33-25.  This was also the last game Sean Taylor (SEAN TAYLOR!!!!!!!11) played."

Souvenir

This is such a great picture I had to share it -- some are going for the souvenir and some are trying to keep from getting hit by it.  And then check out the guy in red holding his beer.

There are just great expressions and reactions in this shot -- the guy in blue on the far right, for instance.  Priceless.  The kid in red with the glove has a bead on it but the other kid's got his glove in his face.  I'm not sure what the guy in the top right is doing with his hands out, since everyone else in the shot makes it obvious the ball is not going anywhere near him.

He Said It (And Probably Regrets It, Too)

“You can’t arrest me, I’m a Colts player.” – Indianapolis Colts safety John Boyett, September 2, 2013.

Make that former Indianapolis Colts safety John Boyett, who was waived from the reserve/non-football injury list this morning after being arrested the previous morning for disorderly conduct, public intoxication, and resisting law enforcement.

Nothing like resetting the Arrest Meter on the Pro Football Talk blog to remind us that the NFL is ready to begin it’s new season in two days.

The Tweet I Feared To Read

Thanks to everyone at the Raiders for the opportunity this preseason. It was a blast. @MarquetteKing's got a bright future with you guys!

— Chris Kluwe (@ChrisWarcraft) September 1, 2013

Marquette King will do well this season, but I was crossing my fingers Chris Kluwe would win the punting job formerly held by future Hall of Famer Shane Lechler. Hopefully Kluwe will find another NFL team soon. He had a really good preseason, but King has an absolute cannon for a leg.

At least Kluwe won’t have to endure a likely 2-14 season this year and punt over 100 times. That’s what’s in store for the Raiders unless Terrelle Pryor magically becomes Randall Cunningham (loved him!) overnight.